he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Enjoy the penises
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
