I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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