So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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