i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
