She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize