i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
