I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
