He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize