yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
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My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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