I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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