so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Put some vodka in it
put some vodka in it
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!