twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
