the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
