I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
