Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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