you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
