You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
