she was so not down for the gang bang
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Randomize