it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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