im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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