You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize
