BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
