Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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