Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
