We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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