Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize