she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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