just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
The beer is more important than you right now.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
