you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
His nipple licking is glorious
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