No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
