So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
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They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
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I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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