its not stalking. its research.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
