Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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