Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
