Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
