She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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