How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Watching her eat just hurts me
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
