Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
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