there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
