im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
