yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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