my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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