just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
