So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
