I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
