i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
