Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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