Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
you never un-have a 4some
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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