This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
