i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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